He will continue to be in my life for as long as I live, yet clearly, the way that will continue is going to change now.... I already miss his day-to-day presence.
Though he started out as a 'home learner', he graduated from our local 'conventional' high school this past February. This was a noteworthy accomplishment for one of the most unconventional young men I have ever met, (that may not have come about without the dedication, acceptance and flexibility of the administration and staff of said school) -- and, I might add, an outcome that was in question several times over the last couple of years, as he expressed frustration and anger at the lack of relevance to his life of the courses he was taking. Since then, he's been trying to figure out what he wants to do with his life.
He spent a lot of time the last three months on a 'school project' -- finishing a CD album of his own original songs (championing his beliefs and dreams for the world). He also spent time in the garden, helping to pull weeds and spread manure, looking forward to this summer's fresh veggie crop. He even cleaned his room! And we had many, many long conversations about the future ... his, mine, yours, the earth's.
Like many teens worldwide, he is deeply concerned about the state of our environment and the state of our relationships -- to ourselves, each other and the planet we all share. Unlike many teens (or adults for that matter) he mainly 'walks his talk.' (Sometimes he walks it literally - it was only recently, at, 18, that he finally consented to get a driver's license.) He also takes ownership of his feelings, expressing them freely and asking others to share theirs. When he 'screws up' (his words) he apologizes and makes amends as needed and possible. If the folks in his world are struggling in relation to each other, he attempts to mediate, pointing out the principle of love and respect and inviting each party to see what's good about the other. He absolutely refuses to listen to backbiting, nor will he speak disparagingly (or even gossip) about another. He's also the 'water police' at our house, using the low-flow toilet in the basement bathroom and reminding each of us to turn the tap off when we're brushing our teeth or washing the dishes.
He was the person who gave me a perspective on the cost to the planet's water reserves our Western way of life creates. For instance, did you know it takes up to 1,500 gallons of water to produce one standard pair of blue jeans? Or 53 gallons to produce a coffee-shop latte?
Very much an independent, with an idealism about what's possible that inspires (and sometimes irritates) others, in 11th grade he suggested his high school create a vegetable garden. Part of it was a creative way he could see for doing an independent study to gain credits towards graduation. Though it didn't work out as an independent study, (and he had very little physically to do with it's construction) the school principal was very open to and supportive of the idea, and several folks from the local green community got involved. The garden not only lives, but through the initiatives of other idealists (both students and faculty) the school has begun composting; (they've been recycling for a long time), and recently planted fruit trees. With help from a BC Hydro grant, they will soon become the first high school in British Columbia to capture enough energy from solar panels on the roof to meet all their hot water needs.
My son has written numerous letters to the local paper, advocating that the former (now unused) elementary school building be used as a community center for our small town, and urging that its grounds be converted into a community garden. (He once wanted to plant apple seeds in the borders of the school grounds, hoping they would eventually turn into trees with fruit to feed people.) Neither of these things have happened so far, but hey, who knows?
Ian is the one young man I know who best epitomizes the Shaw quote, "You see things and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were and I say, "Why not?'"
A week ago, as part of his exploration of how to live "in the world, but not of it," he left our home for a nine-week internship at O.U.R. Ecovillage, a sustainable learning 'intentional' community and demonstration site located in the beautiful Cowichan Valley on Vancouver Island, BC. O.U.R. EcoVillage bases their work on Permaculture principles and offers learning opportunities for Natural Building, Sustainable Food Production and Leadership.
"Permaculture is sustainable land-use design. This is based on ecological and biological principles, often using patterns that occur in nature to maximise effect and minimise work. Permaculture aims to create stable, productive systems that provide for human needs, harmoniously integrating the land with its inhabitants. The ecological processes of plants, animals, their nutrient cycles, climatic factors and weather cycles are all part of the picture. Inhabitants’ needs are provided for using proven technologies for food, energy, shelter and infrastructure. Elements in a system are viewed in relationship to other elements, where the outputs of one element become the inputs of another. Within a Permaculture system ... “wastes” become resources, productivity and yields both increase, and environments are restored. Permaculture principles can be applied to any environment, at any scale, from dense urban settlements to individual homes, from farms to entire regions." --Wikipedia
Of course, this is right up Ian's alley. For several years now, he has been consciously choosing how to live and move in the world based on the need for and virtues of living a life more aligned with our natural rhythms, more unified with those around us. A healthy and sustainable life that is good for the earth and for all her relations.
I'm excited for him personally -- and for all of us, collectively. Learning to live in a community has never been more needed. Humans of all races need to learn how to do this. Learning to live 'sustainably' is critical. I think if we don't learn these skills fast, humanity is doomed. The feedback from the planet and her systems about our present way of life has been loud and long and clear.
We didn't need another 'wake up' call in my mind, but on Earth Day, April 20th -- courtesy of British Petroleum (who did the drilling), the United States government (who let them), and ourselves (through our voracious consumption) -- we got one. The Gulf Coast oil fiasco is just one more incident with untenable consequences, in the long line of 'industrialization' (read global destruction) that began in earnest with the razing of the Cedars of Lebanon around 2000 BCE, ultimately creating the Arabian desert in what was formerly the 'fertile crescent' surrounding the Tigris and Euphrates rivers -- and now, culminating in the worldwide ecological disaster humankind is tottering on the brink of. (Some might say we've slipped over the edge and are in free fall.)
We couldn't be in a bigger mess. We sure as hell don't want to be. Overpopulation, climate change, proliferation of weapons of mass destruction, loss of entire species and ecosystems, new viruses and diseases, economic uncertainty, drought, famine...(need I say more?) Okay, war.... It only stands to reason that trying to solve problems with the same flawed thinking and poor stewardship that created them is not the answer.
But what is?
I remember my own idealistic youth, followed by decades of unflagging optimism about what is possible. Now, at the ripe old age of 53, I am often worn out, jaded, dispirited and disappointed. I can get downright glum about our prospects for creating what, in my heart, I know is possible. Young men and women (and more optimistic older ones) can see the vision for a better future and can't understand why the rest of us aren't changing. They are voting with their lives. Dropping out of the cultural norms and pioneering new forms of living.
They are the kind of idealists we need: fresh, untainted by decades of trying to make a difference, only to have their hard-won contributions wiped out by the 'establishment' or the latest swing of the pendulum of party politics. They see the 'system' for what it is, a construct that has to die for us to live, and they want to choose life, and choose it now.
Linda Kavelin Popov describes idealists as "having a vision of what is possible and wanting to make a difference. Idealists," she says, "care passionately about what is meaningful in life and see things as they could be. They also have faith in the power of change."
Like my dear son, idealists "put ... principles into practice," not merely accepting the way things are or merely talking about how it could be better. Idealists dare to have big dreams and then act as if they are possible. Some of us are "idle dreamers." I think I'm too often guilty of falling in that category. As Linda Popov says, "Idle dreamers just wish things were better. Idealists do something to make things better."
To make things better here on this planet, we need a sustainable design for living as a species, in unity with the other living systems, including Mother Earth herself.
I love that my son and his fellow students are doing something to make things better, not only by learning skills for building sustainably, but also by knowing that everyone and everything on the planet is interdependent and that any true (workable) solution will have to take that into account.
International environmental advocate David Suzuki (another one of the human beings I most admire) contends that "what permaculturists are doing is the most important activity that any group is doing on the planet. We don’t know what details of a truly sustainable future are going to be like, but we need options, we need people experimenting in all kinds of ways; and permaculturists are one of the critical gangs that are doing that.” (italics added)
All around the world, we see destruction and disintegration. It's hard to remain optimistic in the face of it. It's essential that we cling to our idealism -- the kind that dreams and does.
Although he was prophesying about the civil rights movement 44 years ago, Bobby Kennedy's statement is equally true about the 'way of life' of humans on planet earth: "A revolution is coming -- a revolution which will be peaceful if we are wise enough; compassionate if we care enough; successful if we are fortunate enough -- but a revolution which is coming whether we will it or not. We can affect its character; we cannot alter its inevitability."
“There is something awesome, mysterious, and divine in humanity that has called groups of people, throughout history, to risk everything to speak the truth . . . Let us not get lost in the culture of fear that is being thrust upon us... human consciousness is experiencing birth pains. Remember Teilhard de Chardin’s call to assist in this new emergence by passionately practicing love for life.” – Thomas Atum O’Kane
On those days when I find that too hard, I'm gonna stand beside/behind the idealists of this world. (Even if all I can do is make them dinner)
Where will you stand?
The Practice of Idealism
I have a dream.
I have a plan.
I have faith in the highest possible outcome.
I walk my talk.
I persevere.
I make a difference.
I am thankful for the gift of Idealism. It helps me to realize my dreams.
Reflection Questions
What is my dream for this world?
How can I make a difference?
What commitment must I make to 'walk my talk'?
What in my mind is the highest possible outcome and how can I contribute to helping it come about?
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