"Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship." Guatama Buddha
As I feel may way into this Christmas season, the title of the 13th century hymn "Oh come all ye faithful" calls deeply to me.
Christmas reminds me of the many times that my faith in someone I had a right to trust has been undercut and gravely shaken, even destroyed. And how those kinds of betrayals can rock a life for years, decades even. Amid all the hustle and bustle and joyfulness (real or fake) I see around me, I often feel sad.
Losing a faithful father (to abandonment) at a young age has shaped my life, and consequently my choices and the lives of my children.
Can a child recover from a trauma like that?
On the outside it can look like it is so -- but going forward from that kind of painful experience,
many of us who were thus greeted by life (or some other deviation from the healthy nest we deserved to fly from -- put downs, beatings, any form of abuse) have many struggles throughout our lives.
Many continue to make relationships with people who break the faith with them, another loss. The loss of a sacred trust.
And Christmas can bring up these feelings of loss.
Death, divorce, children struggling with addiction, sickness, lost friendships, jobs, life savings, dreams. For many of us, our faith in important things and choices did not pan out. And no matter how long ago it happened, this is a time of the year when the grief and sense of betrayal around those losses can rear its head.
Linda Kavelin Popov reminds us that "Faithfulness is being loyal to our beliefs, remaining firm and steadfast regardless of what happens. When our faith is tested, we stay strong, and learn from the experience. We do our work with meticulous care and excellence, faithful to its true intent.
With the people we love, we are abiding and trustworthy. They know we will not abandon them or violate the sacred trust between us. Faithfulness through the changes and tests of time is a sign of lasting love. Faithful friendship is one of life's greatest treasures."
Several times in my life (and perhaps yours too) people I trusted violated that sacred trust. The blow was visceral -- the damage deep and long lasting.
There can be lessons to be learned from these experiences. Questions to be asked. Though sometimes the violation can be totally out of the blue, oftentimes, upon reflection, it is apparent our intuition was speaking to us, sometimes quietly, sometimes insistently, all along. How can we learn to be faithful, above all else, to ourselves by trusting our own still small voice?
And anyone who has lost a loved one, prematurely, from death, can't help but feel violated by God or fate life itself. (even only briefly) That which they had put faith in, has suddenly, painfully been taken away from them. I remember how violated I felt by my body years ago, when I was almost incapacitated by the syndrome we call Fibromyalgia. Many, many folks the world over also struggle with an 'energy illness' - often from having lived for too long the E personality, everything to everyone.
As I near my 56th birthday, standing on the precipice of a new year I have decided to pledge a new faithfulness to myself and to the only life I can really know I will be an intimate part of until I leave this mortal frame -- my own.
I will continue to be faithful to my community, my commitments, my family and my friends. Just that I will no longer do so at the expense of myself or my inner voice and calling and the path that Life lays before me.
And that feels like the kind of Christmas that will keep on giving -- to me -- and to the wider world -- a world who needs people who are wiling to love themselves so that they can love others and the very planet we all depend on for our survival.
May you find blessings this holiday season -- in your joys and in your sorrows, and may you walk your journey knowing you matter and you deserve faithfulness. May you be faithful to yourself, no matter what emotional/mental state you find yourself at any given time -- evermore.
Namaste
~ Kate
The Practice of Faithfulness
I am committed to my beliefs.
I seek the lessons in difficulties.
I give my work the care it deserves.
I stand by my friends and loved ones.
I have abiding relationships.
I cherish my friendships.
Reflection Questions
What is the lesson in my current difficulty?
What helps me stay strong in times of trouble?
What practices would help me be more faithful to my own precious self?
What boundaries do I need to set with others?
As I feel may way into this Christmas season, the title of the 13th century hymn "Oh come all ye faithful" calls deeply to me.
Christmas reminds me of the many times that my faith in someone I had a right to trust has been undercut and gravely shaken, even destroyed. And how those kinds of betrayals can rock a life for years, decades even. Amid all the hustle and bustle and joyfulness (real or fake) I see around me, I often feel sad.
Losing a faithful father (to abandonment) at a young age has shaped my life, and consequently my choices and the lives of my children.
Can a child recover from a trauma like that?
On the outside it can look like it is so -- but going forward from that kind of painful experience,
many of us who were thus greeted by life (or some other deviation from the healthy nest we deserved to fly from -- put downs, beatings, any form of abuse) have many struggles throughout our lives.
Many continue to make relationships with people who break the faith with them, another loss. The loss of a sacred trust.
And Christmas can bring up these feelings of loss.
Death, divorce, children struggling with addiction, sickness, lost friendships, jobs, life savings, dreams. For many of us, our faith in important things and choices did not pan out. And no matter how long ago it happened, this is a time of the year when the grief and sense of betrayal around those losses can rear its head.
Linda Kavelin Popov reminds us that "Faithfulness is being loyal to our beliefs, remaining firm and steadfast regardless of what happens. When our faith is tested, we stay strong, and learn from the experience. We do our work with meticulous care and excellence, faithful to its true intent.
With the people we love, we are abiding and trustworthy. They know we will not abandon them or violate the sacred trust between us. Faithfulness through the changes and tests of time is a sign of lasting love. Faithful friendship is one of life's greatest treasures."
Several times in my life (and perhaps yours too) people I trusted violated that sacred trust. The blow was visceral -- the damage deep and long lasting.
There can be lessons to be learned from these experiences. Questions to be asked. Though sometimes the violation can be totally out of the blue, oftentimes, upon reflection, it is apparent our intuition was speaking to us, sometimes quietly, sometimes insistently, all along. How can we learn to be faithful, above all else, to ourselves by trusting our own still small voice?
And anyone who has lost a loved one, prematurely, from death, can't help but feel violated by God or fate life itself. (even only briefly) That which they had put faith in, has suddenly, painfully been taken away from them. I remember how violated I felt by my body years ago, when I was almost incapacitated by the syndrome we call Fibromyalgia. Many, many folks the world over also struggle with an 'energy illness' - often from having lived for too long the E personality, everything to everyone.
As I near my 56th birthday, standing on the precipice of a new year I have decided to pledge a new faithfulness to myself and to the only life I can really know I will be an intimate part of until I leave this mortal frame -- my own.
I will continue to be faithful to my community, my commitments, my family and my friends. Just that I will no longer do so at the expense of myself or my inner voice and calling and the path that Life lays before me.
And that feels like the kind of Christmas that will keep on giving -- to me -- and to the wider world -- a world who needs people who are wiling to love themselves so that they can love others and the very planet we all depend on for our survival.
May you find blessings this holiday season -- in your joys and in your sorrows, and may you walk your journey knowing you matter and you deserve faithfulness. May you be faithful to yourself, no matter what emotional/mental state you find yourself at any given time -- evermore.
Namaste
~ Kate
The Practice of Faithfulness
I am committed to my beliefs.
I seek the lessons in difficulties.
I give my work the care it deserves.
I stand by my friends and loved ones.
I have abiding relationships.
I cherish my friendships.
Reflection Questions
What is the lesson in my current difficulty?
What helps me stay strong in times of trouble?
What practices would help me be more faithful to my own precious self?
What boundaries do I need to set with others?
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