William Barclay suggested that "Endurance is not just the ability to endure a hard thing, but to turn it into glory."
I have been blessed to have worked with hundreds of people during my life.
Thinking of them and their stories, and looking around me -- and sometimes within me -- I wonder -- how much can a person endure? And the conclusion I come to over and over again is: apparently -- a whole helluva lot.
The Virtues Reflection card on Endurance says "Endurance is our ability to withstand adversity and hardship. We practice perseverance and patience when obstacles arise, open to the lessons they bring. We don't give up or feel hopeless about ourselves. We hold on. Endurance hones our character and seasons our souls. Weathering the inevitable challenges in our relationships deepens trust and loyalty. It makes love abiding and strong. The early navigators who plotted their course with nothing but the stars became strong, confident sailors. When trouble comes, endurance gives us the strength to stay the course." (Linda Kavelin Popov)
Endurance does not call us to become martyrs for others though. For a long time I endured the pain of living with people who were broken in ways that made it impossible to keep lasting relationship without losing myself and my dignity. People who were unable to truly love and respect another human being. People who in their pain and desperation avoided vulnerability like the plague and resorted to abuse in an attempt to protect themselves from any more damage. No amount of patient endurance, loyalty and love seemed to move the needle for those folks. (and boy did I try)
It's like they were stuck in another reality. Thankfully I have learned that lesson. People who use abuse (which is about a lot more than physical violence) rarely change without years of intensive and deep personal work. Most of them are unable to be that real and vulnerable with and about themselves. I grieve for the lost potential but will no longer put myself in harms way, thinking if only I love them enough they will change. And whenever and wherever I can, I stand with others who are making that choice for themselves, the choice to insist on respectful treatment for all, at all times.
A Tlingit elder once said, "Life is for learning our lessons." and one of the lessons I have learned is not to tolerate abuse, and to have the courage to speak up and stand up when I witness it.
This past year, through a project called Understanding the Village, I learned in a new, experiential way, the incredible endurance of the Coast Salish peoples (and by extension, all peoples who have been colonized by others, as a people or as individuals in abusive relationships) I've learned in a deeper soul touching way the terrible abuse they suffered in the guise of 'help'. And the racism and marginalization many 1st Nations people still endure on a daily basis as well as the incredible adversity facing all people, men, women and children, who live life daily with others who are unable to truly love. There is much restitution and healing required.
As my country celebrates what it calls its birthday, I struggle with openly celebrating the birth of a nation that caused the death of so many other nations. So today, I decided to spend at home, doing some catch up in house and garden and in quiet reflection on what I want to see my country be. (this is in no way meant to offend those people who are in a different place -- may you all experience a happy Canada Day)
Don't get me wrong, Canadians still have much to be thankful for. Most of us have clean water, there is still somewhat of a social safety net, we have medical coverage and other benefits. However, once we were the envy of the world on many fronts and I would like to see that become true again.
As Canada faces another federal election this fall, it is my sincere hope that we will get on the path of rebuilding, this country and her people. That so many of our people will not have to 'endure' so much when the dust settles. What lessons do we need to learn so that this first world country I have the blessing to live in will once and for all address what happened to our 1st peoples and make restitution? When will we address child poverty, climate change, the environment, racism, the inequity between the rich and the poor and start to truly support our young families as they raise our future leaders? When will the 1st peoples of this land have the same opportunities as those of us who descend from the colonizers?
May all those who have been abused find the courage to make a change and truly begin to live. May all people in this country with so much potential get out this fall and cast a ballot for the kind of country they want.
May we become one country and one people --who stand and work together for justice for all.
May it happen soon.
Namaste~
~ Kate
The Practice of Endurance
I find the strength to live through adversity.
I seek the lessons in hardships.
I do not let troubles keep me down.
I accept the challenges love requires.
I have lasting relationships.
I gain confidence by not giving up.
I am thankful for the gift of endurance. It fortifies my will.
Reflection Questions
What relationships are healthy andc worth keeping and which ones should I let go of?
What lessons do my present circumstances illuminate?
How can I create deep trust and loyalty with the people in my life who treat me in a healthy way?
What practices, places and people 'bring me to life'?
I have been blessed to have worked with hundreds of people during my life.
Thinking of them and their stories, and looking around me -- and sometimes within me -- I wonder -- how much can a person endure? And the conclusion I come to over and over again is: apparently -- a whole helluva lot.
The Virtues Reflection card on Endurance says "Endurance is our ability to withstand adversity and hardship. We practice perseverance and patience when obstacles arise, open to the lessons they bring. We don't give up or feel hopeless about ourselves. We hold on. Endurance hones our character and seasons our souls. Weathering the inevitable challenges in our relationships deepens trust and loyalty. It makes love abiding and strong. The early navigators who plotted their course with nothing but the stars became strong, confident sailors. When trouble comes, endurance gives us the strength to stay the course." (Linda Kavelin Popov)
Endurance does not call us to become martyrs for others though. For a long time I endured the pain of living with people who were broken in ways that made it impossible to keep lasting relationship without losing myself and my dignity. People who were unable to truly love and respect another human being. People who in their pain and desperation avoided vulnerability like the plague and resorted to abuse in an attempt to protect themselves from any more damage. No amount of patient endurance, loyalty and love seemed to move the needle for those folks. (and boy did I try)
It's like they were stuck in another reality. Thankfully I have learned that lesson. People who use abuse (which is about a lot more than physical violence) rarely change without years of intensive and deep personal work. Most of them are unable to be that real and vulnerable with and about themselves. I grieve for the lost potential but will no longer put myself in harms way, thinking if only I love them enough they will change. And whenever and wherever I can, I stand with others who are making that choice for themselves, the choice to insist on respectful treatment for all, at all times.
A Tlingit elder once said, "Life is for learning our lessons." and one of the lessons I have learned is not to tolerate abuse, and to have the courage to speak up and stand up when I witness it.
This past year, through a project called Understanding the Village, I learned in a new, experiential way, the incredible endurance of the Coast Salish peoples (and by extension, all peoples who have been colonized by others, as a people or as individuals in abusive relationships) I've learned in a deeper soul touching way the terrible abuse they suffered in the guise of 'help'. And the racism and marginalization many 1st Nations people still endure on a daily basis as well as the incredible adversity facing all people, men, women and children, who live life daily with others who are unable to truly love. There is much restitution and healing required.
As my country celebrates what it calls its birthday, I struggle with openly celebrating the birth of a nation that caused the death of so many other nations. So today, I decided to spend at home, doing some catch up in house and garden and in quiet reflection on what I want to see my country be. (this is in no way meant to offend those people who are in a different place -- may you all experience a happy Canada Day)
Don't get me wrong, Canadians still have much to be thankful for. Most of us have clean water, there is still somewhat of a social safety net, we have medical coverage and other benefits. However, once we were the envy of the world on many fronts and I would like to see that become true again.
As Canada faces another federal election this fall, it is my sincere hope that we will get on the path of rebuilding, this country and her people. That so many of our people will not have to 'endure' so much when the dust settles. What lessons do we need to learn so that this first world country I have the blessing to live in will once and for all address what happened to our 1st peoples and make restitution? When will we address child poverty, climate change, the environment, racism, the inequity between the rich and the poor and start to truly support our young families as they raise our future leaders? When will the 1st peoples of this land have the same opportunities as those of us who descend from the colonizers?
May all those who have been abused find the courage to make a change and truly begin to live. May all people in this country with so much potential get out this fall and cast a ballot for the kind of country they want.
May we become one country and one people --who stand and work together for justice for all.
May it happen soon.
Namaste~
~ Kate
The Practice of Endurance
I find the strength to live through adversity.
I seek the lessons in hardships.
I do not let troubles keep me down.
I accept the challenges love requires.
I have lasting relationships.
I gain confidence by not giving up.
I am thankful for the gift of endurance. It fortifies my will.
Reflection Questions
What relationships are healthy andc worth keeping and which ones should I let go of?
What lessons do my present circumstances illuminate?
How can I create deep trust and loyalty with the people in my life who treat me in a healthy way?
What practices, places and people 'bring me to life'?
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